Little Big Steps in Motherhood

"The baby's here!" the doctor said to me. It was Sunday morning when a little baby came out from me.

It was just the two of us for nearly a year, and one morning had changed the quiet home to a sweet scented corners - a baby is joining the family!

The long contractions and the sleepless nights really made me stronger than I thought I could ever be. And let me tell you - I was TERRIFIED when I listen to stories about giving birth. However when it happened to me, I did not feel like myself - the chicken who is afraid of almost anything painful. I believe God has given me the strength to take the baby out because it was his destiny to be on earth with all of us.

Me? Well.. Someone above trusted me to carry this little baby for 9 months and care for him later. I never thought I have all the strength needed.

In the early days home, I lost all my smiles and peace when this little one arrived, but the gift of being able to keep up with the baby was all provided by the Almighty.

We both learned - a lot. All I have in my mind was - we were once this little, and now I have to take care a little human, who look a lot like me but without the communication ability. We learn how each cues are different - the cries when he is hungry, tired, and bored. This moment really built up our instinct towards him, which could benefit us later in life as his parents.

At times when I was exhausted and worried about his milestone.. I almost forgot that he will grow into the person he wants to be. He will continuously learn about new things and he will be the one who decide how he will learn about things. And that has come to me realizing that I have given birth to an individual human being - and him being in my womb for 9 months teaches me that he will not be in the womb forever, and so in my arms too.

Being a mother teaches me about unconditional love.. and being a mother is not easy. I respect every women who have given birth and no matter how they teach their children, it is still an amazing job that no one else could ever have. Many mothers out there are working - staying at home - making a home business - whatever they are doing, I do believe that they all have the kind heart and sincerity in raising their children. No matter how selfish you were in your youth, having a little one will teach you that life, is not just about you.

And that's perfectly fine.

-C, 2018